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Monday, December 26, 2016

EwR Theory - PART II: It is Important to Be Mindful of Your Conversation Partner if you Want to Be a Successful Conversationalist


The title of today's topic might provoke some strange feelings in some of you.  In fact, some of you might be asking yourselves something like: (a) Is this another sermon being preached to us about how we should act and behave? (b) Why should I be concerned about being considerate of someone during a conversation if they aren't the same with me? (c) Why is this topic of any interest for those people who are just talking with one another casually?  Or maybe, you have another question in your mind.  These are all doubts that might be triggered in one's mind because the word "considerate" conjures up images about being overly polite to someone, showing them too much respect, or appearing to be artificial and insincere with them.

However, as you will soon find out, this is actually a very serious topic to reflect on.  Before you have your next conversation with someone, think about the advice that is given here.  Showing your conversation partner consideration is much more than simply being nice or polite to them.  Let's explore what's involved in being mindful of the person with whom you are speaking, and how it will have a positive effect on your future conversations with othersIf you want to be a successful conversationist, then it is important to (1) recognize who your conversation partner is, (2) determine ahead of time what the purpose of your conversation is with someone else, (3) know what to say and how to say it, and (4) learn how to control your own emotions and behavior during a conversation.

In the second place, assess ahead of time what the purpose of your conversation with someone else is all about. This requires some thought as well.  Many reasons exist why you might have a conversation with someone.  Examples include the following.  Maybe you need to obtain information from a co-worker so you can arrange to meet with them.  Perhaps you are involved in a meeting with another person in order to share information together.  Another situation could also be when you have information that someone else wants from you.
Other possible motives for having a conversation with someone else might also include any of the following: planning or organizing an event together; negotiating on something with someone else; showing someone appreciation for something that they did for you; getting together for a common cause; talking to someone you know; starting a conversation with someone new; having a job interview; participating in a conversation in order to obtain clarity on a personal matter or a business issue; working on a project with someone; learning something new from someone in a formal or informal setting; or maybe obtaining personal or professional feedback from someone before making an important decision.  Many other possibilities also exist in order to identify why you might have a conversation with another person.

If you want to be a good conversationist, it is important to determine what the motive of your conversation is before you meet and talk with someone.  It can mean the difference between success and failure in your communication with that person.  A very easy example of this is going to a job interview and not being prepared.  If you consider why you are going to have a meeting with someone else, then you will know what you need to say, and how you need to say it, in order to obtain your personal or professional objectives that you have in mind.  This leads us to the next important part of being considerate of your conversation partner.

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